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In the Name of Allâh, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful

 

The child who:

 

1. Does not do what his parents order him (this type is Haaqqun - i.e. undutiful/disobedient) which is one of the seven majors sins.

 

2. Does what his parents tell, but is displeased with it (this type does not gain any reward).

 

3. Does what he is told, but follows it up by raising his voice, or mentioning those favours (e.g. I have done so much for you) this type earns a sin.

 

4. Does what he is told willingly and happily. This type is rewarded and they are a few.

 

5. Does what his parents want before he is even told. This is the type which is al-baar al-muwafaq (i.e. dutiful and kind to his parents), and is given the ability to be successful in all his affairs, and they are rare.

 

As for the last 2 types, they are known as Al-Birr (the obedient). About them, don't ask about the barakah Allah puts in their time, wealth, health, efforts, etc whereby it increases and multiplies or a lot of good comes from something little. 

They will have in their life, the vast provision (rizq, wealth, knowledge, health) Allah gives them, and how much their hearts will be at rest. The ease they will find in all their affairs, due to being dutiful to their parents.

 

The difficult question for every person is : 

What type of child are you?

 

What is al-Birr (being dutiful and kind towards one's parents)?

Al Baar means The One who is kind, gentle and ample in goodness. The One who is the doer of good, both materially and spiritually. The One who is kindly and gracious. The One from whom every good deed comes.

 

● Al-Birr is to recognize what is in the heart of your parents and act upon it without waiting for an instruction.

 

● Al-Birr is knowing what makes them happy, then racing towards doing it; and understanding what hurts them, then striving that they don't ever see it from you.

 

● Al-Birr is that you ensure the comfort of your parents, even at the cost of your own happiness; so if your staying out late will cause them worry and stress, then your sleeping early is part of your birr (kindness) towards them.

 

● Al-Birr is to cheer up your parents - at an age where there does not remain a lot which brings them joy and happiness.

 

● Al-Birr is to spend abundantly on your parents from your wealth even if they possess millions, without thinking twice about how much they own or whether they need it; for everything you have is only because of their hard work, and sleepless nights which they spent looking after you.

 

● Al-birr is to look for their comfort, and not let them exert effort to make you comfortable, for it is enough how much they strived for your sake already.

 

Meaning of Allah's name Al-barr

The One who is kind, gentle and ample in goodness. The One who is the doer of good, both materially and spiritually.

The One who is kindly and gracious. The One from whom every good deed comes. The One who is the source of all kindness and goodness.

The One who bountifully bestows the gifts of tolerance, gentleness, goodness and kindness. The One who is ever-merciful and compassionate.
 

From the root b-r-r which has the following classical Arabic connotations:

 


to be devoted, affectionate, gentle
to be just and proper, honest, truthful
to have regard for the circumstances of another
to be beneficent, to bestow bountiful gifts
to reward for service, recompense
to behave courteously, to do good
to be benign, gracious, kindly
to be pious, virtuous, righteous
to be ample, extensive

 

There are many ways of Al-Birr which lead to Jannah (Paradise), so don't restrict it to a single kiss on the forehead which may be followed up by many shortcomings...

 

و قَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلاَّ تَعْبُدُواْ إِلاَّ إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا

{And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment.} (Quran 17:23)…..????

MAY ALLAH TABAARAK WATA'ALA MAKE US AND OUR CHILDREN OBEDIENT TO OUR PARENTS - NO MATTER HOW GROWN UP WE MAY BECOME ???????? 

AMEEEN

 

FOOTNOTES:

Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any human being if it involves sin; obedience is only in that which is right and proper.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7257; Muslim, 1840.

And he said: “There is no obedience to any human being if it involves disobedience of Allah.”

 

[Narrated by Ahmad, 1098]


Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said in al-Ikhtiyaaraat (p. 114): The individual is obliged to obey his parents in matters that are not sinful, even if they are evildoers. … This has to do with that which is beneficial for them and not harmful for him.

It says in al-Mawsoo‘ah al-Fiqhiyyah, 28/327

Obedience to other people – those to whom obedience is obligatory – such as parents, the husband and those in authority – is restricted to matters that do not involve disobedience or sin, because there is no obedience to any human being if it involves disobedience of the Creator.


Shaykh al-Fawzaan (may Allah preserve him) said:
Women are enjoined to obey Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, and they are enjoined to obey their husbands and parents, within the framework of obedience to Allah.

But if obeying a person such as one’s father or husband involves disobedience of the Creator, this is not permissible, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Obedience is only in that which is right and proper)” (narrated by al-Bukhaari) and he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience to the Creator” (narrated by Ahmad).

[Al-Muntaqa min Fataawa al-Shaykh al-Fawzaan, 1/265, 266]

 

24.10.2020
 
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